i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
where does the pee come out of this thing
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
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