You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
