I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize
