This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
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