Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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