This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
