so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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