Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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