Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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