We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Randomize
