Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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