Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
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