dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
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