I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
