I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
