Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Randomize
