Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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