talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Randomize
