They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize