Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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