I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize
