Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
As shirtless as possible
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
