they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
