what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Randomize