so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
