My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
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