I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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