do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
