no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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