I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
