I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
