I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Randomize