Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
