I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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