I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
