Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
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