So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
there was a trapeze. enough said
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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