I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
