Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
