New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
