Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
