I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I came so hard my ears popped.
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