i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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