hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
