I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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