the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
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