If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
