Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
