She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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