Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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