my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
